i felt so stress up, i gt to pay lots of things, my hp bill, internet bill, my dental installment, my bike practical, even nw i stil gt to help pay my home utilities. i gt lots of burden liao le, plus ITE has accepted mi, n now i oso gt to pay my sch fees myself. i cant even breathe. for now, i 1 2 earn money as much as i can. so for now, i wil start to find job liao le, no matter hw many jobs i work. n i wun b able to meet u as much as last time. for mi money is more important den everi thing else. either i gif up my bike or my studies. u cant understand wat im sayin den i say 4get it liao rite. so y stil bother n ask. i juz cant understand it. since u duno wat im sayin den dun bother to know la. kaoz... wait til im in a better mood den say ba... tml i oso dun think i wil b meetin u....

last nite outin was so fantastic haha...quite a few female riders turn up wor... seein so many female riders tis makes mi feel like chiongin to get my 2B license haha...i haf fail 5 times le, bt den well, i wil jia you de, there's definitely 1 day i wil pass my prac 1 de haha tml wil b my prac 1 again liao le haha....so nervous bt den last nite went to buy the guards le, to protect my knee cap n my elbow. i dun 1 2 fall down again sia, i wil jia you de hopefully can pass tml haha bt i dun think so ba, i muz think on positive side n nt negative side, muz haf more confident n tats the way man... cheers to those ladies riders out there...i wish myself all the best haha...

juz went to c dear de blog, n from last yr til nw, we seem to haf alot of arguein especially the first few months when im so stubborn n my temper is hot too, bt nw do we stil haf the same problem again or another problem ne, let me c wat haf i change for the past 8 months. i felt so silly last time haha... oso dunno y i haf the reaction the last time. arguein abt the pic he takes wif gers all tis bt den well, now i noe tat he can b trusted n i totally trust him. wat more could i b worry abt. n the promises i haf given all i haf done it sia... cannt sit on other guys de bike, n hmm cannt meet guys ba.. is tat so haha so tirin

hmmm i haf change the word 'dun tok to mi' tis words, which he dislike alot de haha tis is the onli thing i haf change other den tat wat haf i change so far, discussin abt meetin ppl, other ppl, all tis we haf discuss rite hmm so now gt to change my character liao le haha... i seem so bad for the first few months. guess now i could onli change for the better, tml he's goin for his thailand trip while im goin for my practical 1. i stil feel abit nervous abt it too. going slp nw le tml early mornin goin for my dental checkup den go temple pray liao le... muz remember to come back in one piece. dun 1 u 2 haf any injuries all tis & tat...dislike him to go so far especially on water festival is so dangerous when i heard kester tellin him tat it wil b dangerous so ride carefully. it gives me creeps abt it. anyway im goin to brush my teeth nw le haha....

tokin to keane nw. he just had his accident yesterday, fracture his wrist, broken knee & groin abrasion funny is his dick oso muz do dressin. i was askin him stil can haf sex after recover ma. haha so funny if cannt stand den jia lat liao. den he wil b a tai jian liao le haha...oops seems like im so evil sia...haha

whenever im sad, i go to ur blog & saw those things u post last time, it makes mi feel more sad & guilty i dunno y bt i always cry. im sorry dear i keep on makin u so stress makes u so piss off, i try to change myself k. i nid time to change my mentality my character oso. pls forgive me....my hearts hurt too everi time make u so unhappy...too tire le im goin to slp le. he's always on my mind & the promises i have make i have done it. i nid more time to change my character. tis is all build up since young i cant change overnite....

y are we always arguein abt money neh, if u always being so piss off, y nt from nw eat the meals at home, i dun mind goin home to eat de lo, is u hu always wana eat outside, if u wana save money is fine wif mi ma, next time juz fetch mi home on time to eat my dinner & u go home eat ur dinner den everi thing is solve le ma, the late is my habit is secondary sch til nw le, u 1 mi 2 change is hard nt 1 day can change everi thing de ma, if u dun like to wait den next time dun wait for mi, since i already get use to it le, u like being to be punctual or even b punctual earlier den other ppl. 4 mi i haf already get use to my own timin le, u 1 mi 2 follow urs is abit hard, nt i dun 1 2 change myself i did try to bt den well im stil the same, if i can change y i always late for work. haiz since nw im nt workin maybe we can meet on fri & sat lo, the rest of the weekdays u can go home & take ur dinner den can save up alot of money liao ma. i myself already felt so stress up le, we always argue bcoz of money if tats the case i might as well gif up my study go work full time hao le. haiz so for now we meet on weekend hao le. maybe is gd 4 both of us oso. den u no nid keep on being so piss off & everi time argue wif mi liao le, i oso dun like to argue wif u. gif each other more personal time ba, u gt so much friends waitin to go out wif u. maybe on weekend we den meet ba. we wil tok again on tis lo. i already felt the pressure haiz....maybe we shld meet abit less wil b better for u & i. i dun even noe 4 my character u can tahan how long, gt a feeling tis relationship won't last long. as wat u tel mi abt my character last sun. my metailty is tat stupid is tat naive is tat childish, wat u 1 mi 2 change. love the person hu they are & nt the person hu change for the sake of another. if for gd well, i of coz wil change bt den again time is concerned, i nid hw long to change myself i oso dunno.....maybe in future or a few yrs down the road ba....my mind is always thinkin, maybe u are right, i keep on assumin too much assume tat things wil work out the way i wanted it. well, im wrong, totally wrong, haiz if i gif u too much pressure, we meet lesser lo, i wil contribute money bt as i say drinks or any dessert i wil pay or we go on dutch wil b more better for both of us ba, i dun wish to argue abt it anymore, dun wish to make both of us sad. since u goin on thailand on mon mornin gif tis 3 days both of us a rest ba. i noe u are stress abt money. next time go out less stay at home often ba. sorri to make u unhappy so much i try my best & do whatever i can to make u happy k.

it's me again, yesterday went to ubi & book my practical 1, n the day of my practical is nearin bcoz is next mon & it's the same day as my dental appointment juz tat different timin, i book in the afternoon hehe...so scare & nervous sia, after all i so long nv touch the bike liao, i scare i might 4gt hw 2 throttle all tis, & especially the hand brake tat keep on makes mi fail my practical de, ubi de hand brake is nt like dear de leh, i oso dunno y, i hope can pass ba, after all i learn so much frm dear liao, haha he say gif mi 10 chances, if i stil cannt pass, den i can 4get abt ridin liao le haha....i oso agree wif him hehe...

yo, finally come back to blog liao le, haha i haf come back from cameron since 1 wk le, bt den i gt no time 2 blog, so now, come back n blog lo, keke....juz nw went to east coast n cyclin, wow tats so shag sia,dear say my balancin n turnin k le, shld go n book my practical 1 soon, haiz juz nw rainin den go parkway there sit down n tok, hmmm if i dun change my mentality n my habit n character, soon dear cannt tahan mi liao le, n he wil b like carol de bf, say buai buai 2 mi le, haiz i try 2 change lo, since dear say if it's for gd den y nt change, haiz so scare 1 day he cannt tahan mi he wil leave mi, looks like i muz stop thinkin abt tis 1 day, if nt really comes true i surely jia lat de, k im goin 2 eat my dinner le, nw waitin for dear de pic den i can upload all inside my gallary :P n dear is plannin to go cameron again on may, haha.... n tis time i muz definitely remember to bring my torchlight n my mp3, if nt along the highway im sure im bore de hehe....

juz nw went to try dear de bike n den wow lao it was heavy lo, more heavy den the 2b bike, n my god de hw m i goin to take class 2 license if it's heavy sia, haiz oh ya i hafn even pass my practical 1 yet, n i think so far already think im mad n crazy already haha...from sharin the experience in those ladies forum n wow all of them are like so clever sia, muz take them for example den i can take my 2b well n haf a determination oso. k let's count 2 wks from now, i shld b able to book practical 1, den renew my membership le. i wil jia you jia you de, all the gers wil support mi de rite. haha...so thick skin :P

i've been thinkin shld i go learn my bike ant, bt den my glove haf throw away liao le, im scare im like last time cant control the bike well n cant balance it well, seein so many gers tat ride, if i stil dun go n learn den someone wil say, *u dun even haf a bike license i dun understand y u inside sbf doin wat* tis phrase i wil always remember bcoz it was say by shoei. yes n it is him hu say mi
bt den wat abt my dental payment i stil gt $700 hafn pay yet. haiz wat m i doin to do, i noe tat my cdc account stil left $90 which means i stil can learn a few practicals bt den i haf fail 3 times, n im pai seh to go n being laugh by the instructor or those ppl hu are learnin their class 2a n class 2. n no ppl pei mi go learn all the while gt dear pei mi go here go there, bt nw if i wana go learn bike no ppl pei mi go wor, wat m i suppose to do haiz shld i go n learn ma, dear has always encouraging mi go n learn n i think he wil definitely support mi go learn de, bt den i cant concentrate sia, eg the close throttle open throttle clutch the gear all tis kind n cdc de bike de brake is so hard to brake sia, haiz wat m i goin to do, alot of ppl haf been encouragin me. bt yet haiz i stil dun dare go n learn. i already gt one scar on my hand liao le, wat if i stil gt another scar den wat m i suppose to do sobzzz.... n i wun b nice liao le. a nice body juz gif mi ruin like tat. teach mi wat shld i do. haiz n im scare i oso dun haf any future so wat gd reason shld i gif myself to go n learn bike??? haiz.....if i really 1 2 go n learn den i shld learn balancin my bicylce well 1st b4 go learnin the bike...haiz....sad, sobz....vex n confuse....

i noe someone is regret knowin me, u can choose to back out now, i dun mind, anyway i noe myself well, im a person wif no future if choosin to leave mi, i dun blame u, i did say b4, tv is my favourite thing which i likes, plus u gt too many appointments n u cant keep on askin mi to join which i dun like rite, i noe u are upset wif mi, bt wat can i do, since u need gf tat can accompany u more often den u go find 1 lo, go find a gf tat can accompany u everi min, everi sec n everi day. i 1 2 enjy my day, dun 1 2 argue wif u, anyway dun think tis wk wil meet u up, since u gt so many appointments which u cant miss any of them. so let it b lo, u go do ur stuff while i go do my stuff, i dun bother u le, u continue go use ur computer ba. bcoz i noe u wun watch tv de as i noe u dislike watchin tv shows. bt i like u cant stop mi.

sobz i juz kana sack from the tan tock seng hospital reason is tat i do things too slow liao le sobz im born to do things slow de ma wat can i do wor, tis is the 2nd time liao le, m i destinated to work as a sales girl rather den work in a office sobz im really sad, my heart is like being stab into pieces sobz and now im sick due to nt drinkin enough water sobz maybe im stupid enough yes n i agree i shld have go die the few yrs back, and i wouldn have the pain rite now, no friends to talk to and where have my friends gone to. they have disappeared since the separation of our sec 4. all gone totally gone, now wat state m i, if i had known tis situation i shld have stay at loyang there my colleagues all there. there are much more fun and i wouldn b so sad now, all bcoz of the 2pid nitec, bcoz of u the 2pid nitec coz mi lost the job tat i like. i hate 2pid nite. now wat m i a ghost or a half dead half ghost i totally no mood at all, i dun feel like eatin i dun feel like anything rite now, im dead a person tat is totally no feelin at all. sobz... haiz wish i didn born in tis world to have so much of pain

dear de bike, wif 4 monsters protectin me hehe where's another monster he is dear lo hehe

yesterday went to Orang Asli n eat, and wow dear was riding 180 wif onli 3rd gear sia, i could onli hold tite dear bcoz of the strong wind i scare being flown away sia, haha....tats was thrilling, imagine on the dark road n my shirt was flying haha can imagine the cold air behind my back keke but dear say wif the top box it becomes more unstable liao sia, haha now i gt 4 monster protecting me wor, 2 side panel box, 1 top box, and where's another monster, haha he's dear lo infron of me ridin ma, hehe....so together i gt 4 monster protectin mi keke....cool hor haha.... tis mornin wake up stomach pain again haiz 2pid stomach, i hate being a ger, y i cant b a guy haiz at least guys are much more better den gers sobzz i hate it, any place of the body pain i can endure bt nt on stomach i simply juz hate it i hate it.... argh 2pid ass hole

back to blog liao le, well on valentine's day went to my cousin weddin dinner as posted their pictures below. and dear give mi a set of cosmetic haha i tot he wil give mi a perfume anyway i didn tot he wil buy me a present as we say earlier, that my digital camera wil be my valentine's present as well hmmm so naughty of him hehe and Michelle juz tel mi she might getting ROM by end of tis yr i think so haha, finally she can settle down liao i oso hope her Dom wil treat her lots better den nw hehe... anyway i told her if really ROM muz invite mi go and see wor hehe and right now im waiting for job interview le, juz receive a cal there's a job at AMK there near the SSDC bt i dun even noe where is the place, anyway i could onli be confirm when he calls me n rite now im at home watching my Young and Dangerous dvd by Ekin my idol haha luvs him lots sia wonder wat is he doin rite now wor, he looks so cool when acted as a triad leader sia, damn cool wor, his face is so yandao haha... so far i onli haf 2 idols wor, Ekin and Jimmy Lin, the rest nt so like haha tis 2 are my favourite Idols....haiz n my stomach pain 2day sia so sian goin 2 buy my panadol soon coz its going 2 finish up by mi soon haha... think im addicted 2 tis panadol for life sia haiz really wish tat there's a medicine to stop my stomach pain haiz goin watch tv le hehe blog in another time le

Their big day settle down on valentine's day 14-02-2005 happily married cheers to my cousin

Tea ceremonry serve tea to her brother, in return get a hong bao back hehe

Saying their vows as they are christian

Me and my cousin, and oh shit de i look so fat sia gain alot of weight recently haiz

happy chinese new yr...hehe...finally cum in n blog i couldn cum in is bcoz my computer was down until chu yi dear cum my hm bai nian shun pian help mi repair computer hehe...hmmm tis yr de new yr is so special sia, new yr eve stay at hm watch tv bt den after my reunion dinner went to my cousin home, tat stays in a condon wow tats was so fantastic sia.... chu yi wake up catch the part of show tat i miss out, den go dear de ah ma home, n it happen tat his ah ma is stayin at the same blk as my aunt wor, my aunt stays at 5th while his ah ma stays at 4th... so coincidence haha... tis yr is so special sia, normally alone i celebrate bt tis yr gt dear sia... 1st time go his ah ma house bai nian, after his ah ma house cum back 2 my home, bt so weird by the time we cum back, my aunts hafn even cum yet, haha n den tis yr left out 1 aunt coz another aunt was at Australia, bt she gt cal up at chu yi, n tis yr oso special we didn play the blackjack at all sia, haha until yesterday chu er, went to my ah kim place at Sengkang, we den play, n guess wat i win.... haha... we play $2 n den play double oso i take out $2 or $4 to play until the last round b4 we end i win around $20+ haha... i hardly win that much, normally i no win no lose juz nice bt tis yr i actually did win..hmmm... izzit bcoz of my luck ma... bt dear de zodiac tis yr seems 2 b in gd yr wor, dear is a house well im a cow haha... can u imagine tat when i read the character of the cow it was almost exactly like mine, i cant even imagine tat haha... well the tiger hmmm doesn even sound like mi haha...later goin Joo Gong home, den follow go Sab home, yesterday gt 1 person at Stacey's home tats y i didn go haha...thanks 2 dear sia, tis yr i feel so happy wor, n yesterday alot of ppl askin mi y my bf didn go haha... i tel my 1st aunt tat i dun intend 2 bring him go, scare later my ah kim de sister sayin things they veri gd at talkin ppl de, tats y i dun like them, humpf... say other ppl they themself oso nt so gd kns sia.... ah bish... let's c wat is my plan tml... i will be goin 2 my mother tat side 2 bai nian i alone go la haha coz onli go 2 my cousin house ma, den at nite maybe hafin dinner wif dear sec sch friends... den sun i c whether im goin 2 my teacher house or go 2 Lum's house... heard he gt dog sia, i scare wor...

juz nw went to c dear de blog...n those sadness n tears start 2 drop...although is the past bt i stil couldn't help it bt feel sad...hmmm nw u haf finish paying ur laptop loan, bt yet i didn ask u do u stil haf enough money 2 survive ma...i scare next time u wil say mi off if u dun haf any money left... bt so far i think u stil haf money 2 spend, hope im rite hehe....other den the other time i really cried becoz u say mi, i hate ppl say me, dunno y, my cousin oso dun like ppl say him... izzit almost ppl dun like ppl 2 say them or wat... after u tel mi spare a thought for u, n u doesn 1 me 2 embarrass me, n my singin is out of tune, tis 3 phrase has been in my mind ever since... i cant control bt keep on remember the word my singin is out of tune...next mon we wil go 2 Hongbao River den on new yr eve i wil sacrifice my countdown n stay at hm 2 watch the tv...coz i've been thinkin everi time my aunt ask 4 u, u wil come my hm no matter wat, n nw is my turn 2 go meet ur aunt le... if nt next time u sure wil say everi time ur aunt ask 4 mi, i keep on didn go, well, i think i oso shld put in ur shoes... bt im pai seh ma..some more my skin is nt so thick as urs k, my courage is timid im nt so brave... tats y til nw i stil dun dare go back 2 bike practical bcoz i dun haf enough courage n brave...later goin 2 c u le...so i goin bath le...